I’m Not Ready!!!

I had some pretty intense contractions this morning.  There were only five or six but it was to the point where I started to panic a bit and think no! not yet baby!  It’s too soon!!

With my first it was quite gradual.  Back pain followed by mild contractions.  I’m assuming this one will go roughly the same, but you never know how these things will go.

I also didn’t have any false labour pains with him, so this is new to me.

I’m only 28 weeks along and I’m pretty sure I’m just dehydrated. I’m sure the stress I’m feeling lately with my husband starting a new job, and work being crazy doesn’t help.

But this episode did make me want to start really preparing for the birth.  I feel like there’s so much I have to do – everything from wash her clothes and setting up the baby stuff to getting myself ready mentally and emotionally to go through the whole giving birth thing again.

And because I’m a list person, I’m making a list.  And here it is:

  • Register at the hospital.  I’m planning for a homebirth, but I need to register anyways just in case.
  • Finish putting her crib together.  I was able to get it all assembled except for the mattress part – I need my husbands help with that.
  • Wash her clothes and get them sorted. I want to feel that her room and stuff is all set for her.
  • Pack a hospital bag.  With my first I threw stuff in a bag as we were leaving the house to go to the birth centre. I’d rather not do that again.
  • Buy bins for her room.  We’re not using a dresser but instead a desk that we have in the closet (sounds weird, I know, but it works!) and I need bins to keep her clothes in.
  • Finish her room.  I need to finish clearing out the desk and shelves that are in there and hang her pictures.
  • Move our bed against the wall.  We have a very heavy bedroom set and right now the bed is in the middle of the wall.  Because I will more than likely be cosleeping with her – at least for a little while – I want to have this all ready to go.
  • Buy a mattress protector thingy for our bed.  I didn’t have this for our son and I’m surprised his copious amounts of spit up didn’t destroy our bed.  Plus, I just might end up giving birth in our bed (not my plan, I’d rather be downstairs, but you never know) and yeah.
  • Buy post partum stuff.  I just got some Angle Mamma bottom spray (I think it’s called) but I need some other sexy stuff – like depends.
  • Get my post partum plan sorted.  This means figuring out how long my husband will be home (even though he’s starting a new job, I’m pretty sure he’ll get two weeks), how long my parents will come up (they came for three weeks last time and were incredibly helpful – though I’m not sure we want them staying with us again this time, we just don’t have the room), and contacting post partum doulas to come once or twice a week after my parents leave.
  • Make food things.  Having loaves of banana/zucchini/pumpkin breads and muffins in the freezer was a huge help in the first weeks. I was hungry!! Might make some chili too, but honestly, we were good to make food each day.
  • Face my fear.  I didn’t think I had any fear going into this the second time, but turns out, yeah, I do.  Need to confront that and own it before I go into this so that I know I can handle anything.
  • Practice deep breathing.  I need to chill the fuck out.  I started to panic a bit this morning and I can’t feel that way when the time comes.

Good thing the contractions subsided.  Although, honestly if it had been the real thing, it would have been ok.  Well, except for the fact that she has so much more growing to do in there!!!

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